REUBEN! Mm he was not supposed to be bear of the month but it would appear that's he's elbowed his way in.
" Reuben " says Mrs Mum " It's a bit early for you to be Bear of the month"
" But Mrs Mum I need to be able to reach the most people as soon as possible! " says Reuben " I cannot be waiting round this village for ever! "
" How are you going to do that? " questions Mrs Mum
" I am going to address the people who come look at this village ! They may have just what I am looking for!"
Mrs Mum's not so sure..but she waves him on. He gets out his notes , clears his throat with a little cough and then begins.
" Hello. My Name is Reuben . I am a very friendly bear .." He hears someone snort but ignores it and carries on " and I am looking for a Sasha or Gregor of note! Who I will decide if I will consent to stay with and be their own personal Bear "
He shuffles his papers " I will ONLY consider the finest of person, they must NOT have a philtrum !
they must have all their own hair, no re roots need apply!
It must be the correct length and in perfect condition , so on that note no brunette's need apply as it is my understanding that their hair falls!! I will not belong to no Baldy! " he stops listening, he is sure he heard a gasp!
It stay's quiet so he carry's on " I would prefer that they have all their original clothes and shoe's and do not have any scrapes and shiny patches. If you are born after 1968 you need NOT apply! Please send your photo with a 250 word essay on why I should consider your application. Please allow me time to look at the hundred's of letter's I will receive, for you can all see that I am a particularly fine bear !"
He looks over a stunned looking Mrs Mum " I do believe I'll be out of here by the end of the week!" looking almost happy he walks off whistling!!
I see Mr Mossy!!!
ReplyDeleteNoted :)
DeleteOh Reuben you poor deluded little bear. You're going to be sadly disappointed. How could you possibly expect your special playmate no philtrum to write as many as 250 words - you'll give them hand cramp. It's the holidays so no one will apply - they are too busy having fun outdoors (except for my poor teen daughter with philtrum who is revising and researching an essay, and she isn't a Sasha and was born long after 1968).
ReplyDeleteHe Thinks, they will be desparate for him to be Their bear! I am beginning to wonder if he was dropped on his head when he was a cub!! could explain his behaviour!! well maybe not :)
DeleteThink Ruben's risking being thrown out by the end of the week!
ReplyDeleteI see Mr Mossy too - has the point already gone to Michelle as she was first?
Hi Rosie, yes Reuben is pushing his luck!!
DeleteThe Where's Mossy comp, means that anyone says I see you Mr mossy and I'll keep there score but you need to email with where he is , so I can keep track of who si correct or not!
also there will be extra points to gain or lose!! so read before you see :)
email address is on sale page if you don't have it already
I'm here Mrs Mum and SS-R.
ReplyDeleteNoted for both :)
Deletedee, ive come to conclude that you must have absolutely no customers all day in your bank to be able to think of all these wonderful stories, xxxxxxx
ReplyDeleteIf that were true Sarah, I'd be able to write a book!! :)
DeleteFunnily enough I usually think of them when I am at home or on weekend's , rarely at work..but if I do have an idea at work I'll write it down and save if for later!!
lovely to see your comment :) xxxx
Firstly. I've spotted Mr Mossy.
ReplyDeleteSecondly love today's post but THAT Reuben is certainly a hard task master with his list of needs, wants and requirements for his special 'little Miss.'
Just hope that there is a doll out somewhere out there that can tick all those boxes.
We've already had to eliminate several from here due to damaged lips, cut or slightly falling hair and will have to check if they came with their original outfits before we start on any 250 word essays, as time is so precious and they're not keen on missing so much Summer playtime if they don't stand even the remotest chance of being accepted for the position.
I'm hoping though that he will soon come to his senses after his first few interviews and realise the perfection isn't everything and that the Sasha 'waifs and strays' have far more fun in life.
That Reuben is a trial sent by Steve to test us here in the village!
DeleteI'm sure all sasha's and Gregor's who happen to see his request will only be writing him letter's of complaint!
I just hope none of the waif's in this village find out he is making his requests blog wide!!
Will he ever see sense??? that's a good question.. :)
I've seen Mr Mossy!!!!
ReplyDeleteReuben is absolutely hilarious, and he hasn't a clue that we find him as such! I wish I had such a girl that he could come and be her bear chum, but I haven't, but I will keep my ears peeled in case the door bell should ring and one is standing there looking for a home! LOL.....yeah right!
If he ever gets down off his High Horse there are some nice girls and boys in all of our homes, who I'm sure would relish the opportunity to hug him tightly, dress him in funny clothes and drag him about by one arm!!!!
That may well happen , as you slip down that slope :)
DeleteHe may well get pushed off the High horse, if he's not careful! He need's to have a little Miss pick him soon before he get's to big for his boots to be saved!!!
& I don't think his demands & requests will end there! Once Ms Perfect arrives, I'm sure he will lead her a merry tune:D
ReplyDeletePS: I spy Mr. M:)
Hi Nikola, nice to see you appearing here on Dees blog! I will have to introduce tou two and tell her how you came to be interested, no let me rephrase that, smitten, by Sasha!!!! And are now on that slippery slope!!!!
DeleteHugs Sharon xxxx
Ps Dee, Nikola has the Addiction now too!!!!
Hi Nikola, welcome to the never ending Sasha addiction! I would say run while you still can but in truth it's too late already :)
DeleteYes I am sure that Reuben will continue in his bossy way even if he gets a little miss!!
My little girl says 'I see Mr Mossy'.
ReplyDeleteNoted :)
DeleteMorning! Better late than never! I have spotted Mos (I hope it is Mos unless you have left Cordelia's last wig laying around in the garden!!
ReplyDeleteLove the Reuben story...that boy has some attitude!!
You know if I did not know better I'd swear that Reuben must have come via your house :))
DeleteFunny you should say that.... :)
DeleteGracious, that Reuben! My Maisy felt sorry for him for awhile, but she would like to inform him that her hair is quite lovely even if she is a brunette!
ReplyDeleteShe also would like it noted that we spy Mr. Mossy whom she would love to adopt.
I see Mr Mossy the little scamp
ReplyDelete